Don't Let Your Dreams Become Nightmares (Enjoy the View)

As you’re busy climbing toward your dream and fighting to keep it alive in the midst of cynicism, competition, and copycats, I ask you this one thing. Don’t let your dreams become nightmares.

when dreams become nightmares

Marc and I are juggling dreams right now. We have a lot of priorities. Live somewhere we love, do something we love, and spend quality time with people we love.

Sounds simple right? Essentially it all still goes back to love. And since a lot of what we love involves mountains, exploring, and having awesome experiences, adventurously is still the modifier on how we love at the Bergreen house.

But sometimes even with what seems like a clear goal, it’s easy to be pulled in countless directions. I can’t simultaneously weave left while ducking right. Constant u-turns really impede my forward progress.

How can I both wake up earlier and get more sleep? Is it possible to celebrate with dessert while also getting fit and healthy? Can I be my best at all my roles (mom, wife, photographer, business owner, friend, daughter)?

Eventually stress, pressure, and expectations cloud my reasons for doing ‘it all’ in the first place. It’s simply not fun anymore.

And that’s not a good place to be.

Have you ever climbed a mountain so focused on getting to the summit that you realized you’re not having fun anymore? What’s the point then? Suffering for sufferings sake?

Or will the view be so spectacular that it will all be worth it? At the minimum make sure your dreams are type 2 fun, miserable in the moment but fun in your memory.

Check that you’re still running towards your dream and not being chased by a nightmare.

making a choice

I’ve always resisted when people say you have to sacrifice something for something else. I’m gradually coming around to the idea though. (Please stop me if you think I should hold firm.)

As an empathetic person and a people pleaser, I spend an extreme amount of time analyzing conversations and interactions. I replay things in my head and wonder if I could have said or done something differently. It’s normal for me to fall asleep worrying about someone else’s problems, perhaps as an excuse to avoid my own.

Lately, I’ve decided that this is something I could let go of. Trying to please everyone has become a nightmare. I would rather focus on the needs of myself, my husband, and my children.

Does it sound callous? A little. Does it make me a bad friend? Maybe. But maybe being a good friend in the past will have bought be some grace, patience, and understanding.

My hope is that the choice will make me a better mom and wife. Sometimes we have to choose.

Sometimes we make sacrifices and press pause on other things in order to focus on what we’re working on.

What will you choose to let go of so that you can have a better grip on something else?

get ‘er done

Sometimes done is better than perfect.

The end. What’s next?

date your dream

You know how people are always telling you that date nights are important? It’s good to nurture your relationship and sometimes that means scheduling fun. I always thought those people were working too hard.

Now that I’m working too hard, I realize what they were talking about. Marc and I work together and parent together which makes it hard to simply be together. The first weekend I met him I told my friends how much fun he was and we’ve been having fun together ever since.

Except when we’re too busy and forget to make time for fun. Dreams are like that too. Sometimes we’re so focused on climbing the mountain of our dream that we forget to take the time to stop and check out the view where we are.

Here are some things I’m trying out, let me know your thoughts:

Slow down once in awhile. Pause. Pop the champagne for a small victory.

Evaluate, recommit, and find some gratitude for your dream.

conclusion

My challenge for you this today is to find ways to keep your dream from becoming a nightmare.

Note for adventurers: Customize at will, type 2 fun is allowed. Marc used to have a sticker that said: “My best vacation is your worst nightmare.”

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I’m Brenda Bergreen, one grateful half of a husband and wife photography team specializing in outdoor weddings and other adventures. Capturing people in nature and the mountain lifestyle is a passion that became a dream (that became a goal) that became a life.

Based in Evergreen, CO we travel throughout the state as Colorado mountain and adventure wedding photographers. We also frequently travel to California and other wedding destinations to document your love in a variety of memorable settings. Don’t hesitate to contact us and let us know how we can help! Be sure to follow us (weddings instagram & adventures instagram) and/or like us (facebook) to stay tuned.

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